BOLD COLD BREW CREW
FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE
Team Will Now Be Known As ‘Bold Cold Brew Crew’
VERONA, N.J. — Due to the upcoming election that will take place during the 2016 Bobcats4Ever season, the team formerly known as “Thanks Obama!” will undertake a re-branding process to become the “Bold Cold Brew Crew,” effective immediately.
“We love our time as Thanks Obama!, but it just won’t make sense anymore, come November,” team owner Andrew Vazzano said in a statement. “Our move to the Bold Cold Brew Crew is a step in the right direction for us.”
The new team logo (above), will be accompanied by a uniform and helmet change (right).
“Our new name shows our passion for cold brew, alliterations and that awesome sight when milk is poured into a cup of coffee,” Vazzano said.
BCBC ended the season in fifth place in 2015, despite a string of bad luck. The team was the most high-powered point scorer in the league, tallying 1,685 points over the season. Unfortunately, the football gods did not look kindly upon BCBC, as they also had the most points scored against them (1,622) by a wide, wide margin.
“We’re looking forward to a strong season this year and hope to contend for the title,” the owner said.
BCBC General Manager Gus the Groundhog could not be reached for comment, the team said, as he is hard at work assembling the roster for next year and/or might be dead.
The team has since launched a Twitter account and accompanying hashtag.